Tips to Help You Become a Champion Caregiver for Elderly Parents

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caregiver for elderlyIf someone were providing care services for you, how would you want that caregiver/care receiver relationship to look? What qualities would shift that degree of care from ordinary to extraordinary?

Taking care of an older loved one at home is a noble and selfless commitment. It’s never a responsibility that should be taken lightly, or taken on halfheartedly. These tips make it possible to become not just a fantastic caregiver, but a care champion who empowers an older adult to thrive.

Foster independence. No one wants to feel as if they’re no longer self-sufficient, or that someone is coming in and taking over. Encourage and motivate the senior to do what they are able to do safely and comfortably on their own, providing whatever support is necessary along the way.

Practice empathy. It’s a helpful exercise to routinely put yourself in the senior’s shoes and consider how you would like to be treated if roles were reversed. This may mean setting your own personal feelings aside to better understand those of the other person.

Be creative. Think outside of the box for ideas to brighten every day. For instance, declare Mondays to be “Milkshake Mondays,” experimenting with making and sampling new flavors together. If the senior loves dogs, invite a pet therapist over or spend an afternoon at the local humane society. Have a movie marathon day featuring all of the senior’s favorite films. The ideas are limitless!

Let Responsive Home Care’s trained and experienced care experts assist with additional ideas and help with care needs in the home. Call us at (954) 486-6440 to request a free in-home consultation.

How to Handle the Unexpected Emotions of Caregiver Anger and Resentment

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ver Anger and ResentmentIf you were to list the top five emotions you experience in meeting the caregiving needs of your elderly parents, what would they be? Maybe you’d first think of emotions like love, compassion, and in some cases, even frustration or stress. Would anger make the list? In many cases, though family care providers might not wish to admit it, caregiver anger and resentment are very real.

The reality is that a large number of adult children grapple with the reality that their parents are getting older. Growing up, our parents might have exuded health, strength, and control, giving us an underlying impression that they would always be there for us. Watching a decline in their health upends that belief, that could leave us feeling let down, disillusioned, fearful, anxious, and yes – angry.

As the tide shifts and aging parents become the ones needing care, family dynamics may become complicated. And the negative stereotype within our culture towards aging informs us that growing older is something we must resist or deny – something that may have a direct impact on how both aging adults and their adult children handle age-related decline.

Add to that the increased stress experienced by individuals who are part of the sandwich generation – caring for children at home and aging parents at the same time. Approximately one out of three adults with elderly parents believe their parents require some degree of care as well as emotional support.

So, how might you shift to a more positive mindset? The most crucial step is coming to a place of acceptance. Laura Cartensen, Stanford University psychology professor and director of its Center on Longevity, explains, “The issue is less about avoiding the inevitable and more about living satisfying lives with limitations. Accepting aging and mortality can be liberating.”

Honest, open communication is also essential. Family caregivers and their parents should share their feelings in regards to what is working well in the relationship, and what needs to be improved. Oftentimes, just understanding the other person’s perspective makes a huge difference. For instance, a senior parent may voice annoyance with being reminded to put on his/her glasses. An appropriate response may be to clarify the reason for the reminders – because of a fear that the parent may fall, for example. A compromise can then be reached.

Concentrating on the quality time your caregiving role affords you with your aging parents, while handling your parents’ needs with your own, is key. One of the most effective ways to achieve this is by selecting a trusted care partner to assist. Call Responsive Home Care at (954) 486-6440 for more information about our services.

How to Address One of the Leading Caregiver Struggles: Caregiver Dread

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One of the most common caregiver struggles is caregiver dread.

What are your first thoughts as soon as you wake up in the morning? Are you looking forward to what your day holds, or would you prefer to crawl back under the covers and remain there? If you are feeling more dread than delight as you think through your caregiving tasks for the day, you are not the only one. In fact, caregiver dread is one of the most common caregiver struggles we help families with each and every day.

Distinctly different from anxiety, depression, and even burnout, caregiver dread is a heavy, exhausted feeling of duty. It stems from feelings of overcommitment as well as the need to escape from obligations. While feasible to muscle through and carry out needed tasks in spite of these feelings, there are methods to conquer them instead – and restore the joy that comes from making life better for someone you love. To begin with, try these techniques:

  1. Release the guilt. Meeting the care needs of a person can feel unimpactful, mundane, and just downright difficult. It requires selflessness, which can feel burdening. Yet dreading the daily tasks you’re obligated to do in no way is a reflection of how you feel towards your loved one. Acknowledge to yourself that your role is not easy, and it is okay to wish you could be doing something else.
  2. Deliberately search for joy. The little pleasures each day holds may be diminished by the difficulties. Make the effort every day to find five small things which make you smile. Keep a journal of each day’s finds and refer back to it at the conclusion of every week. Engage all of your senses as you look for the day’s joys: the smell of freshly brewing coffee; the beauty of the sunrise; the sound of your cat purring; the invigorating feeling of a hot shower.
  3. Set boundaries. Schedule time daily to spend on things that you enjoy apart from the senior loved one in your care. Plan and look forward to this time when your caregiving responsibilities begin to weigh you down. An established and trusted care partner is vital to ensure that nothing impedes with the important time of looking after yourself.

Remind yourself that the work you are doing in caring for your senior loved one is extremely important. Yet also keep in mind that no one can do it all, and in order to provide the very best care for the senior and for yourself, frequent breaks from care tasks are essential.

Connect with our experts in elder care in Fort Lauderdale and nearby areas at (954) 486-6440 to arrange for regular respite care services and release the stress of caregiving dread. We’re here for as much or as little assistance as you need to help you enjoy quality time together with a family member and also to rediscover joy in your own life as well.

 

Taking Care of Elderly Parents After the Pandemic: The Shift We Can Expect

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Employers may now have a different perspective on those taking care of elderly parents post-pandemic.

If there is a single positive after-effect regarding the pandemic, it is the appreciation generated for the plight of family caregivers. Managing work and home life is without question a tremendous challenge for those taking care of elderly parents. As Lindsay Jurist-Rosner, CEO of Wellthy, explains, “Caregiving went from a silent struggle to being in the spotlight overnight.”

Businesses were suddenly thrown into the fire of navigating a world of balancing the safety of staff along with the need to uphold productivity. Here is what we discovered – and what we can expect in the future:

    • More telecommuting. Individuals who began working from home in the last year have, in some cases, demonstrated their ability to be much more productive. Because of this, it is predicted that nearly 25 – 30% of the workforce within the United States will continue telecommuting at least several days a week this year.
    • Less stress. Doing away with the daily commute opens up extra time for self-care for family caregivers, while enhancing peace of mind. This is particularly true for those who relied on public transportation and were wary of compromised health safety. To further boost mental health, many employers are offering subscriptions to mindfulness and meditation apps.
    • A corporate culture of caring. Working from home has opened up the personal elements of our lives to employers. Zoom meetings share our living spaces with each other, including the appearance of pets, children, and other household members. As a result, the workplace has started to become more humanized, resulting in a more empathetic working environment.
    • Emphasis on mental wellness. Along those lines, there is now greater awareness of the significance of attending to our mental health. A Kaiser Family Foundation poll shared that nearly 45% of adults experienced negative mental health affects as a result of the pandemic – and an even more substantial percentage in those who function as family caregivers for older family members. Many employers have started implementing ways to take care of the mental health of their employees, such as offering virtual adventures and trips to give the chance to relax and escape.

Let Responsive Home Care, who offers the best respite care in Weston, FL and the surrounding areas, further help nurture a better work-life balance with our dependable respite care services. Regular, ongoing respite care is key to the general wellness of family caregivers. Our skilled and compassionate home care team is on hand to help with anything from only a few hours every week up to and including 24/7 care. Call us at (954) 486-6440 to request a no cost in-home assessment to find out more.

 

What to Do When Relatives Avoid Helping with Senior Care

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What to Do When Relatives Avoid Helping with Senior Care

Tips for family caregivers providing senior care.

If you find yourself managing all of the in-home care for an aging parent while your siblings distance themselves from helping, you’re far from alone. In fact, half of all family caregivers are taking care of an aging loved one solo, according to a recent report from AARP.

Why is this scenario so common – and what can you do to protect your own health, which can easily be affected by providing senior care on your own? Our Fort Lauderdale, FL area in-home care experts have the answers.

1. Family members don’t realize there’s a need for help. It could very well be that from the outside looking in, you have everything covered and running smoothly, and aren’t in need of their support.

What to do: Have an honest, open conversation, explaining the stress you’re under. Invite your siblings or other family members to visit during a time of higher intensity care needs, such as when you’re preparing dinner and then helping the senior get ready for bed, and enlist their help so they can see firsthand how much work is involved.

2. They don’t know what to do to help. While it may seem intuitive to simply jump in and meet a senior’s needs to you, that’s not the case for everyone.

What to do: Make a list of specific tasks that you could use help with, along with the days and times that assistance is needed, and ask for volunteers.

3.  They’re afraid or uncomfortable. For someone who’s never cared for an older adult, it can be truly daunting.

What to do: Invite them to “shadow” you for a day to help gain confidence in the particular tasks that they’re uncomfortable with. A little hands-on training can make all the difference.

At Responsive Home Care, our caregivers are always at the ready to work with you to meet the care needs of your loved one, with professionalism, dedication, and compassion, so you’re never alone. Call us at (954) 486-6440 and let us help! We can provide a skilled, dependable, and friendly home health aide in Fort Lauderdale, FL and throughout the Broward County area. See our service area page for more details.

 

How to Set Yourself Free from Caregiver Guilt

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Caregivers can let go of caregiver guilt with these tips.

Family care providers give a great deal of themselves to take care of their senior loved ones, often sacrificing their own individual needs and desires during the process. It seems normal to assume then that caregivers would feel good about themselves, with high self-esteem and sense of purpose.

However, the exact opposite is usually true, with many family caregivers dealing with feelings of caregiver guilt, wishing they had more patience, a remedy for all of their loved ones’ dilemmas, or the power to do everything by themselves without the need for help. They may have set unattainable and unrealistic guidelines, that could result in:

  • Bitterness
  • Feeling trapped
  • Never feeling good enough
  • Wanting to get away
  • Loss of pleasure in life
  • Elevated stress
  • Missing out on high quality time with loved ones
  • And more

If you are dealing with feelings of family caregiver guilt, taking these steps can be extremely freeing:

  1. Admit your feelings of guilt and also the particular cause of it; as an example, “I feel guilty because I became impatient with Dad’s repetitive questions.”
  2. Maintain a realistic perspective, understanding that all family caregivers are encountering challenges. We are all human.
  3. Switch your internal “should have” dialogues to a more positive slant: “It is challenging to answer the same questions repeatedly, and I’m doing the best that I can.”
  4. Turn your focus to a positive accomplishment. Remind yourself of the joke you told that made Dad chuckle this morning, or how much he enjoyed the meal you prepared.
  5. Be sure to put aside enough time for comforting, pleasurable and gratifying activities: engaging in favorite hobbies and pastimes, journaling, spending time with friends, family and pets, etc.
  6. Adhere to a healthier lifestyle that includes healthy eating, aiming for 7 – 8 hours of sleep each night, exercising, quitting smoking and limiting alcohol consumption.
  7. Find a support partner. To be the best care provider you can be calls for routine, regular breaks from caregiving to take care of yourself.

Contact Responsive Home Care, the top-rated provider of home health care in Plantation and surrounding areas, at 954-486-6440 for dependable respite care which enables family caregivers time to destress and unwind, an essential component to effective elder care. We’re available in accordance with your desired schedule and routine, with as much or as little ongoing support as needed, up through 24/7 care. Keep in mind that taking the best care of yourself allows you to provide the best care for the older adult you love, and we are always here to help!

Caregiver Tips for Dementia: False Accusations

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caregiver consoling senior woman

These caregiver tips for dementia can help with one particular difficulty: false accusations.

It can come seemingly out of thin air: you place your loved one’s favorite tuna sandwich on the table – light on the mayo, no onions – something which typically brings her joy. But today, she pushes the plate away and will not take a bite, insisting that you’ve poisoned the meal.

Or, you have provided the senior with a meaningful activity that links her to a significant time in her past career, sorting paperwork. Out of the blue, she charges you with tampering with the documents in order to steal money from her bank account.

How can you most effectively diffuse situations like these dementia false accusations?

  1. Keep a controlled, gentle, understanding tone. It may be instinctive to be defensive and refute the accusation, but appropriate responses may include something such as, “I see that you are feeling afraid, but I will not let anything bad happen to you. Let’s enjoy this food together,” or, “Oh no, are you missing some money? The bank is not open at the moment, but let’s go there right away tomorrow to get it straightened out.”
  2. Move into a welcomed distraction. After sharing in the senior’s concern, transition into a pleasant topic or activity that your loved one likes, or move to another area. In the case of the suspected food poisoning, you could engage the senior in going to the kitchen and helping her prepare a fresh sandwich. If you’ve assured the senior that you will stop by the bank together tomorrow, a walk outside to look at the flowers and birds, or playing some favorite music, can help.
  3. Never argue or try to reason. These approaches very often escalate agitation in someone with dementia. It might take some time and experience to develop the approach that works best, and that strategy could need to change from one day to another. The goal is to stay calm, patient, and empathetic, validating the senior’s feelings and offering comfort.

Responsive Home Care’s home care experts are highly trained and experienced in effective, creative dementia care techniques, and can help with managing challenging situations and behaviors, enabling a senior loved one to experience a greater quality of life, and providing family caregivers with relief and peace of mind. Reach out to us today at 954-486-6440 for more information about our in-home care in Fort Lauderdale, FL and the surrounding area or to inquire about additional resources to help you better care for a senior loved one with Alzheimer’s.

Top Tips for Caring for Aging Parents—Even When They Expect A Lot

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A senior woman with gray and white hair crosses her arms and looks disparagingly at the camera.

Partner with Responsive Home Care for superior help with caring for aging parents.

In a perfect world, we could compartmentalize our caregiving duties, staying with a routine that met the needs of a senior loved one, while allowing enough time to manage our myriad of other responsibilities. But needless to say, life does not adhere to our desired script, and conflicting needs are frequent when caring for an aging parent. Many older adults balk at the need for help, while others can come to rely too greatly on an adult child, leading to unfulfilled expectations and ultimately irritation for both parties.

Responsive Home Care’s senior care professionals offer the following tips to help explain expectations and communicate effectively when caring for aging parents:

  • Emphasize empathy. As opposed to pulling away from a senior loved one whose demands seem unrealistic, stop and empathize. Think through the problems your parent is facing, and exactly how it might feel to be in his / her shoes. Then voice your honest concern and desire to help.
  • Enable each other to be heard. Initiate a discussion with your senior loved one, encouraging her or him to convey how it feels to be in need of care, and what kind of care is necessary. Determine what the older adult’s goals are, and then share your personal expectations and limitations in having the capability to completely meet his or her needs.
  • Compromise to come to a solution. Achieving a resolution that works well for both of you might be less difficult than you believe. For instance, in the event that the older adult expects help with transportation in accordance with a particular schedule several times a week, perhaps you can provide that assistance one day, while recruiting the help of others to cover additional days. This allows for increased socialization for the senior as well as the healthy life balance you need.

Responsive Home Care is prepared to partner family caregivers with highly skilled, carefully matched caregivers in Fort Lauderdale and the surrounding areas who are passionate about making life the very best it can be for older adults. Working together with Responsive Home Care enables adult children to make certain their aging parents are well cared for at all times, whether by filling in with respite care where needed, through around-the-clock live-in care, or any number of solutions in between. Just some of the many ways we can help include:

  • Running errands
  • Planning and preparing nourishing meals
  • Keeping the home clean and neat
  • Offering friendly companionship to brighten each day
  • Creative and highly specialized care for those with dementia
  • And much more

Give us a call at 954-486-6440 to discuss the challenges you’re facing, and also to learn how our caregivers in Fort Lauderdale, FL and surrounding areas can help. To learn more about all of the areas we serve in Florida, please visit our Service Area page.

How Male Caregivers Can Find More Support

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senior handicapped woman smelling flowers

Consider a partner like Responsive Home Care for trusted respite care services.

If you were asked to paint a picture of a typical family caregiver, you’d likely portray a middle-aged woman, perhaps preparing a meal, helping with bathing or getting dressed, transporting a loved one to medical appointments. And your assessment would be accurate; AARP reports the typical caregiver profile is a 49-year-old female performing acts of service such as these for a 69-year-old female relative facing long-term health concerns.

However, there’s a growing trend of men stepping into – or sometimes, falling into by default – the role of caregiver: nearly 40% of all caregivers, in fact. And while there are some trending differences in caregiving difficulties between the genders (such as a higher likelihood of discomfort for men in performing personal care tasks), all caregivers, regardless of gender, need a strong system of support.

Edwin Walker, deputy assistant secretary for aging at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (and a family caregiver himself), emphasizes the importance of peer support for male caregivers, who are often reluctant to share their feelings and concerns. Carving out time to enjoy favorite pastimes and hobbies with friends, seeking the assistance of a professional counselor, or joining a caregiver support group are several ways male caregivers can maintain their own emotional and physical health in order to provide the best care for their loved ones.

And if no support system is in place for male caregivers, one option is to start a new one. One such innovative male caregiver support network was created by several men who unexpectedly found themselves in caregiving roles. The men get together on a regular basis for outings, dinners, or just a cup of coffee and conversation.

Another form of support for male caregivers to consider is to partner with a reputable in-home care agency, like Responsive Home Care, for trusted respite care services that allow for much-needed breaks from care. Call us at 954-486-6440 to learn more about how we provide the kind of home health services Fort Lauderdale, FL families recommend most. To learn more about the other areas we serve in Florida, please visit our Service Area page.

How to Manage 5 Tough (But Normal) Emotions in Caregiving

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Sad woman being comforted by a friend

It is normal to have strong emotions in caregiving as you offer assistance to a senior loved one.

If you are feeling somewhat disheartened in your role as caregiver, take heart; you’re in good company. Providing homecare for a loved one is perhaps one of the most complex roles we can hold: highly gratifying on the one hand, while at the same time frustrating and ever-evolving, often bringing about feelings of doubt on whether we are up to the challenge and providing the most effective care.

It’s why a number of family members providing care grapple with some or all of these types of emotions in caregiving:

  • Guilt: You may feel as though you are not doing as much as you can to help your parent, that you’re self-centered for seeking time away to yourself, or that you are inadequate to provide the assistance a senior loved one needs.
  • Helplessness: There are a few circumstances when you simply can’t solve the issues your loved one is experiencing.
  • Anger or frustration: This could be directed at yourself, other family members who seem as if they are not doing their fair share, or even at your older parent for causing you to be in this situation.
  • Resentment: Particularly common when taking care of an individual who hurt or betrayed you in the past, it is easy for those feelings to resurface when that individual is now in your care.
  • Hopelessness: When a senior faces a difficult diagnosis for example, a chronic or terminal condition, feelings of despair can settle in, that could result in despondency or depression.

Recognizing these feelings, and accepting they are completely normal, is a good place to start. These tips can also help:

  • Share your emotions. Find a trustworthy friend, family member, or professional counselor to vent to, a person who can provide a different perspective and help you to shift your thinking to a more positive slant.
  • Think about the advice you would offer a friend. Sometimes, stepping out of your circumstances and picturing how you would react to someone else dealing with these feelings will offer invaluable insight. Offer the same encouragement you’d offer to another to yourself.
  • Find a care partner. Working together with a knowledgeable care provider, like Responsive Home Care, enables you to achieve a healthy life balance – something that is vital to every caregiver.

Reach out to our highly trained, experienced, and compassionate care team by calling 954-486-6440 and let us walk alongside you with the high quality, personalized care services your loved one deserves – making it possible to take much-needed time for self-care. We are always available to answer any questions you have, to provide practical resources specific to the concerns you’re facing as a caregiver in Fort Lauderdale, Florida or the surrounding area, and also to provide a free of charge in-home consultation to share how our team in home health care in Ft. Lauderdale can help.

Best Ways to Avoid Crossing the Line From Motivation to Bullying with Aging Parents

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Ft. Lauderdale senior home care

Sometimes the words we use when speaking to our elders can do more harm than good. Learn how to uplift seniors with these helpful tips!

As a family caregiver, you no doubt encounter a variety of emotions during the day: shared laughter over a joke with your loved one; worry due to a health concern; and of course, occasionally, irritations. We want only the best for people we love, and if an older adult is resistant to doing something we know is beneficial, it may be hard to choose the most appropriate reply.

The important thing is to try to supply motivation and encouragement, while also being cautious not to cross the line into bullying the senior. These tips from our Ft. Lauderdale senior home care team are important to remember:

  • There’s no one-size-fits-all. An approach that has worked in one situation is possibly altogether ineffective in another. In the event a loved one refuses to take a bath, for example, you could simply prefer to let the matter slide and attempt again another day. Or, maybe reframing bath time into a relaxing spa activity will carry some more appeal. Including humor may work nicely one day, whereas using a kinder, softer tone of voice may be the answer on another. Having a number of strategies at the ready can help cut down on irritation for both of you.
  • Encourage the senior to remain in control. Have a heart-to-heart chat with the older adult during the course of a relaxed, peaceful moment to obtain suggestions as to how the caregiving relationship is going, and what she or he wishes to see modified. It is essential to then take to heart the older adult’s feedback and incorporate it into your caregiving approach.
  • Be careful to avoid progressive bullying. Although we certainly would not set out to bully a loved one into submission, it is possible to slowly move from encouragement and inspiration into pushiness and forcefulness without noticing it. Take an honest look at your inclinations in speaking with your loved one, and then take steps to improve upon them as needed.
  • Remember the overarching priority. Apart from the many tasks required in delivering care for a loved one, preserving a healthy, happy and fulfilling relationship with one another is vital. If you realize that the worries of providing care are outweighing the rewards for either of you at any time, there is always the possibility of exploring alternate care options such as in-home respite care, letting you place your focus on spending quality time together with the older adult you love.

Responsive Home Care is the ideal partner for family caregivers. Our caregiving staff are highly trained and skilled in the many areas of senior home care, and will provide the assistance family members need to preserve healthy relationships with those who they love. Contact us online or call us at 954-486-6440 and request an in-home consultation to discover the difference our home health services in Fort Lauderdale, FL and nearby areas can make in both a senior’s total well-being and yours.

The Power of Positive Thinking: How to Overcome Caregiver Stress

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Responsive Home Care is the ideal solution to achieve a healthier life balance – both for family caregivers and the older adults in their care.

Our facial expressions reveal so much to people around us, and when you are experiencing an abnormal degree of stress, well-meaning friends will certainly notice it, perhaps encouraging you to essentially, “Cheer up, buttercup!” In reality, of course, it requires a lot more than a few words to turn our mood around and to help us overcome caregiver stress.

Recent research supports the idea of positive thinking as a method to decrease levels of depression and anxiety which occur when we are flooded with stress – something essential for busy family caregivers to take to heart to reduce the possibility for burnout.

Judith Moskowitz, lead psychologist in the research project who subsequently created a course to overcome the unpredictable manner of emotions so frequent in individuals providing care for a senior loved one, says, “We’re not saying don’t be sad or upset about what’s going on. But we know people can experience positive emotions alongside that negative emotion, and that positive emotion can help them cope better.”

The primary techniques in her program include the following:

• Keep a journal of things for which you’re grateful – including the small things.

• Identify at least one uplifting event every single day.

• Talk about this occurrence with your family on social networks.

• Establish one new goal every day, and keep track of your progress in achieving it.

• Identify one of your talents and contemplate how you’re making use of that skill.

• Undertake one daily simple act of kindness for another.

• Think about a negative event, and then discover a way to view it in a positive light.

• Practice focused breathing and mindfulness to bring back a sense of calm.

For those of you providing care for a loved one with dementia, the need to concentrate on positives can be much more vital to overall wellbeing. Family caregivers who participated in a recent five-week study where the effectiveness of these coping skills was evaluated documented a decrease in depression scores of 16%, and a decrease in anxiety of 14%.

In addition to the strategies above, it is necessary for family caregivers to stop isolating themselves and trying to manage their caregiving duties solo, which can very quickly bring on caregiver burnout along with other significant health problems. Partnering with an established Sunrise elderly care, like Responsive Home Care, is the ideal solution to help in achieving a healthier life balance – both for family caregivers and the older adults in their care.

Life is indeed stressful, but we are ready to help! Contact Responsive Home Care, the leader in home health care in Pembroke Pines, and let us help you overcome caregiver stress so that you can concentrate on self-care and good quality time with those you love.